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As Ever

As ever – Lee Hong Ki

I’m coming to a point in my life where i’m beginning to realise that i do have dreams regarding what i want to do with it and maybe for once i should pursue them, no matter how stupid and unattainable they are. A desperate point. I’m getting old and i’ve spent that getting old thinking small, thinking safe, thinking dull, thinking that which i would have to try and exert the least, and i haven’t even made it there. I’m going back to school soon, but i think even that is filing in for an unimaginative, direct, inferior career path.

What i would like to do… ready?.. Really, one thing i would like to do is write for television. Specifically Korean television. I want to write dramas. That is what i want to do. I have good ideas, and i believe the only place suitable for and accepting of these ideas is Korean television. Maybe there are other places. It sure ain’t Australia. What walls i put up for myself.

What walls? There are things i have to do. Flesh out these ideas for starters – actually write something. There are probably academic credentials i should get as well. But beyond all that there’s me being a non-Korean wanting to enter an industry where the only white people seem to be English teachers recruited as background actors for scenes set overseas. No matter how universal love, romance, comedy and drama may be, i would have to learn the language and all sense of filial duty, social propriety, the way the country – geography, infrastructure, history and culture – positions people, and the (to us) weird, open relation to bodily functions, especially poop.

There are many ways this dream is closed to me, but thinking that way is not going to get me anywhere. It’s an industry that will thrive without me, but still one i would like so much to enter. And one i believe i can contribute to. It’s an industry that has a proper path to follow for those to be where i want to be, and i am not on it. Maybe i can Cyrano de Bergerac my scripts to someone. I don’t mind giving up credit. This song is from the 2009 drama You’re Beautiful.

I’d be so good at that.

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